Yesterday, I was confronted with three disgusting presentations of ignorance. It started in the morning, when we received an email from a public relations mutt from Florida who offered us the “opportunity” to speak to a woman who was on a crusade to save homosexuals from themselves. She claimed that she had been a lesbian for 13 years, and it ruined her life, but now that she’s back on the straight and narrow, she’s ready to help others avoid the trials of her life. Don’t misunderstand, she’s not speaking out about the difficulties faced by homosexuals in a modern society that still thinks two guys getting married is worse than Kim Kardashian throwing down with whatever gets her a reality show next. She’s saying that all the misfortunes in her life can be blamed specifically on her “choice” to be a lesbian.
From now, until the end of time, choosing not to call this woman, invite her on the show, and proceed to roast her like a pig on a spit, will stand as the shiniest example of self control I may be capable of. Despite my urge to force her to defend her asinine statements, to put her on trial under the charge of grand ignorance, I decided that giving her a channel to spew her garbage, even with honorable intentions, would make me an equal form of pond scum to this trollop. That’s why I’m not publishing her name, the name of her PR Firm, or the contact information sent out to a number of radio stations throughout the country. While I’m well aware of the brisk, sweeping power of the internet, I would rather she remain anonymous than to become a martyr for what she would call a cause.
So, I spent the day quelling a personal ragefest for that. I watched Philadelphia drop game 5 to the Devils, which dropped me to 0-3 in 2nd round predictions, and that didn’t help my mood any. I went on Twitter, and that’s when I noticed that Against Me! and their lead singer Tom Gabel were trending topics. “Salvation!” I screamed silently, in my head, so as not to cause my wife to think me crazier than usual. Finally, a band that doesn’t suck is trending on Twitter, and it’s not because someone died! Maybe this means a new album, maybe some unreleased tracks, a cool TV appearance… the possibilities were endless. I had to investigate.
Upon further examination, I found the story that had that Internet’s attention. Tom Gabel had come out as a transgendered man, who plans to make the transition to living as a woman. Tom plans to get hormone therapy, start hair removal treatments, and will change his(her) name to Laura. The coolest part of this story? Tom’s wife Heather? Totally cool with it. Do what makes you happy, she said. What a great story about a (wo)man taking a terrifying step out in to a judgemental society, having the guts to do it, and having support at his(her) side.
I was in a really positive space after reading that. The perfect counterpoint, thought to myself, the only thing that will make this better would be to actually throw on some Against Me. Sadly, my iTunes is a little light (a mistake I plan to rectify) so I turned to YouTube, found a playlist, and started jamming out. And you know what ruined it? The very same internet that helped me find the story in the first place.
The first video I pulled up was the video for Thrash Unreal, and the first comment on the page was some Keyboard Hero talking about how gross it was that Tom was embarrassing the band like he was. The next was in agreement. After that, some increasingly vulgar slurs I won’t share. Mixed in were kind words, but it was too late. My positive mood was soured by further proof that maybe, just maybe, this world needs a new flood. Such blatant, uncalled for ignorance. It really gets hard to take. Someone said it perfectly the other day… “Sometimes, I wish I was stupid, so that when people say stupid things, it wouldn’t bother me so much…”. It’s true, and sad, all at the same time. Instead of wishing they were better people, I find myself wishing that I wasn’t a reasonably evolved member of this oft flawed species.
Oh, and that’s about the time I saw that North Carolina voted to ban same sex marriage yesterday as well.
3 strikes humanity. As Kenny Powers would say, “You’re fucking out!”
Hear more Dalby on The Goat’s Morning Breath, weekday mornings on 106.1 The Goat in Lloydminster, or at http://borderrock.com
